Economic downturn affects crooks too.

This is a short piece, (made up), I thought was a fun twist on the economic situation of today.

In a recent undercover study of criminal activity I found a surprising twist to the workings of crooks. It all started with a curious question… What are criminals facing during this “Financial Crisis”? Disguised as a local cat burglar on holiday I went to the underground for criminal doings. I started with a few easy questions like “Are you enjoying this fine fall weather”?, “Good halls this year, huh”?, “What are your plans for the weekend”? These questions were met with the kind of gruff responses you would expect from a group of people that are as secretive as they are law abiding.

I then got to the real questions. I found a real talkative fellow who was willing to take my questions. He asked me to call him Bugsy (he revealed to me that he was a big fan of the thugs from the Looney Tunes cartoons).

Me: What is your line of “work” in the underground world of criminology?

Bugsy: I am a professional pick pocket.

Me: How exciting. How long have you been a pick pocket?

Bugsy: Oh I dunno … I’d say about 15 to 18 years give or take 2-3. See I started out as an apprentice to jewel thief. Didn’t care for that so much… to much planning and watching and studying blue prints and stuff. I just wanted something I could go out side and get accomplished, something easy.

Me: How has the pick pocket business been?

Bugsy: Well when I first started things were pretty easy, I could pick any pocket I wanted and get something of value; wallets, check books, credit cards,the occasional cell phone, IPod, or PDA. Those were good times!

Me: And now that there is an economic down turn?

Bugsy: It's not as easy as it once was. Now I have to be on the look out for my next target. You know watch what people are doing, were they are going, were they have been. It takes more planning and preparation before I can successfully pick someone's pocket.

Me: What do you mean by "successfully"?

Bugsy: People are carrying less and less money than they used to. They also hold their gadgets in tighter pockets, so it's not that easy any more.

Me: What are you going to do for the future, Bugsy?

Bugsy: I was thinking it might be easier to switch to something like “Identity Theft”. That’s were the real money is nowadays.

I left Bugsy after our interview with a new perspective… It seems it is not just the lower to middle class that are suffering.

By Jason Rowlee